9.02.2008

Friends say a lot about us...

"Friends are the family we choose for ourselves," writer Edna Buchanan once said. I consider the "family" I've gathered—with five kinds of pals I count on for completely different things—among the wisest choices I've made. If you can find even one who embodies any of the characteristics that follow, you can consider yourself fortunate.

1. The Uplifter
This woman's favorite word: yes. You could tell her you're trading your six-figure income for a career in offtrack betting, and she'd barely pause before yelping "Go for it!" Don't you need someone who looks past the love handles to notice the extraordinarily gorgeous you?

2. The Travel Buddy
When the hotel in St. Lucia is a bust, one characteristic becomes all-important: flexibility. This agreeable companion need not be the girl you traded pinkie swears with on the playground; it's enough that she's comfortable with quiet (between gabfests) and is a teensy bit mischievous (as in tequila after midnight).

3. The Truth Teller
Intent is what separates the constructive from the abusive. Once you've established that the hard news is spoken in love (not in jealousy or malice), you'd be smart to seek out this woman's perspective.

4. The Girl Who Just Wants to Have Fun
One Saturday a pal and I—and yes, we're both over age 12—pored over every glitter lip gloss in a drugstore aisle for an entire 45 minutes. Forget the crisis download (for that, see the Uplifter); this partnership is about spontaneous good times.

5. The Unlikely Friend
"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive," Ana├»s Nin wrote. My friends—some twice my age, others half, some rich, others homeless, some black like me, others Korean, Mexican, Caucasian—have added richness to my life that only variety can bring.
In order to truly communicate, we must take responsibility for the heart space that exists between us and another. It is that heart space, or the absence of it, which will determine whether communication is miraculous or fearful.

—Excerpted from A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of A Course in Miracles

Commitment

Commitment in a relationship means commitment to the process of mutual understanding and forgiveness--no matter how many conversations it takes, nor how uncomfortable those conversations might sometimes be.

—Excerpted from A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of A Course in Miracles

The above excerpt was emailed to me earlier this week and has really been something I've been thinking on lately. A good lesson for life.

Horoscope for all you Virgos

I'm not sure if you've had a chance to check out the horoscopes by Rick Levine on Tarot.com but I think it is safe to say, this man must be peeking in my window at night!

So here's the horoscope for all you Virgos for today courtesy of Mr. Levine and www.tarot.com

"Others may see you as a heavy-handed authority figure today. You are likely wielding more control than you realize, but there's nothing that needs to be changed right now. You should be aware that the Sun-Saturn conjunction in your sign gives you the power to pull your energy in and effectively focus your intentions on the future."

9.01.2008

Reflections - another year passed

Only days remain in my 29th year here and I struggle to make peace with the milestone before me, although I think I've got it... "You are supposed to be where you are." I was told this in a "solve the problems of the world" conversation over margaritas (which is the birthplace of all solid problem solving conversations) earlier today. I wonder if this person was saying this because they too are reflecting on their life and situation or if imparting some wisdom was the true goal.

"Throw the plan out the window," I am told, "you have to live in the moment." That's right you know. I know that life is about the journey - not the destination. I don't want to look back in another 10 years and realize that I didn't have any fun, but don't you have to be going somewhere? Don't you have to have direction? Is life really all about the here and now? No regrets - that is how I want to live my life BUT I also don't want to get so caught up in living that I miss the forest for the trees.

I often wonder, am I traveling down this road because I chose it, because I thought it is what I should accomplish, because it was part of my "master plan", or because of sheer dumb luck? I'd like to think I had more control over my destiny, but the more I reflect on making life less complicated, I realize much of my life has been being in the right place at the right time. I know I'm good with the person I am on the inside today.


I have no regrets so far.

Here's hoping I can keep it that way for another year! Cheers!